I read a fantastic blog post today called “F*ck Yes Or No”, which asserts that in fledgling relationships we are wasting our time if the other person’s presence in our life doesn’t cause a spontaneous resounding “heck yeah!” to cross our lips. I love this idea, to skip the triteness of relational ambivalence and instead surround ourselves with people who elicit spontaneous fist bumps of joy.
I decided Tina and I had to be friends because her mother in law publicly proclaimed that she was an amazing woman – she felt blessed that her son married her. That statement made me feel like Tina could teach me something. The decision was made for me, really, within 5 minutes of a catalogue party at her house. The items for sale were jewelry. Even though I wear only a plain wedding band from Dave and a necklace from my father I bought a bracelet, as friends do at their new BFF’s party, especially when their BFF doesn’t know she has earned such a prestigious new official title.
Last Saturday night Dave and I were out on a double date with our best friends to watch another friend’s fantastic sci-fi synth band perform. The first time I spent any time with this couple (guitarist and his lovely wife)during their children’s birthday party their house was full to bursting with palpable love, delicious baking and filial bonding across generations. Talk about spontaneous fist bumps (in my mind, though, I am working on not scaring people away with my inability to follow social norms).
Our double date had a cameo appearance of the nicest Buffy the Vampire Slayer watcher I met at that party many months ago. Side bar, did Angel’s love for Buffy ruin anyone else’s expectations for love and honor in their adult life? I mean, why couldn’t they ever figure it out and reclaim their love? I was so ecstatic to run into this lovely lady again that I ran my inebriated butt to my husband and told him that the nicest girl was there.
His response, “You met her at a birthday party for children, you’ve spoken once.”
WHAT I WISH I SAID WEDNESDAY
So? I met you once for mango margaritas and decided to marry you before our dinners were brought to the table. Do you really want to talk about this?
BOOM. That was the sound of me dropping the mic.