As a former smelly kid, someone abysmally terrible at making friends of my own accord until middle school, and then employing poor decision-making in order to obtain friends, I am always tuned in to the friendship tales of my children. We put them in clubs and events, orchestrating play dates and becoming friends with other parents to help ease their transition into friendships. When the bullying started at Twinkle’s school I was afraid that her only friendships would be the ones we were carefully orchestrating for her through our associations with other adults. I feared that she wasn’t learning how to create friendships independently of her well-intentioned but completely meddlesome mom.
Yesterday the grey clouds of Michigan’s second polar vortex parted, I swear I heard a blue bird sing and crickets chirp somewhere in the distance as Twinkle ran to me with a birthday party invitation in her hand. An invitation to a party where I did not know the child or the parent prior to receiving a request of Twinkle’s presence at the event. I had no part in facilitating the creation of this friendship. She very calmly explained to her brother, a Ninja who was already sitting on a birthday invitation for this weekend, that she too now had a party to attend.
I love the theory, practice and pedagogy of our kid’s new school. On a more visceral level I love that Twinkle has a second chance to be seen as a child of worth to her peers.